It doesn't have to be this way, mama
Motherhood is a beautiful, rewarding journey—but it’s also full of moments that test our patience, resilience, and energy. From sleepless nights to endless to-do lists, stress often feels like an inevitable part of being a mom. Society tells us that stress and motherhood are a package deal - you can't have the latter without accepting the first. However, there are ways to manage this stress and bring more peace to your daily life. Here are some practical strategies to help you reduce stress, embrace imperfection, and take care of yourself along the way.
Set Realistic Expectations (and Embrace the Mess)
One of the biggest sources of stress in motherhood comes from feeling like we need to do everything “perfectly.” Whether it’s the spotless house, the homemade meals, or being available 24/7, these expectations can weigh us down. Instead, try setting realistic goals for each day. Aim for progress over perfection—some days, that may mean prioritizing time with your kids over tackling the laundry, and that’s perfectly okay.
We teach our 1-on-1 clients to take their home management and laundry tasks in small doses each day while also embracing the mess and chaos that comes with raising little ones. Remind yourself that it’s not about doing everything; it’s about doing what matters most.
Practice Deep Breathing or Mindfulness
When we’re stressed, our body responds with by tightening up and feeling on edge. Practicing deep breathing exercises or a few minutes of mindfulness can help you relax in the moment, lower cortisol, and clear your mind. Start small: try taking three deep breaths, focusing on slowly inhaling and exhaling. You can even incorporate breathing exercises into daily activities, like when you’re waiting for your coffee to brew or as you lay in bed in the morning.
These small moments of mindfulness may seem simple, but they can be powerful for resetting your mental and emotional state.
Create a Routine That Works for You
Routines bring a sense of stability, which can reduce stress for both you and your kids. While motherhood is full of unpredictability, having a basic routine can help make your days feel more manageable. It also helps your family know what to expect. Establishing consistent times for meals, naps, and bedtime can create a sense of order in your home. It also helps kids feel secure when they know what to expect.
Remember, routines aren’t about rigid schedules but about finding what works best for your family. Start with a simple routine and be willing to adjust as needed.
Ask for Help and Build a Support System
One of the hardest things for moms to do is ask for help. But managing stress often requires support from others. Reach out to friends, family, or other moms in your community. Whether it’s asking a friend to watch your kids for an hour, scheduling a coffee chat with another mom, or joining a local support group, remember that you don’t have to go through this alone.
Sometimes, simply having someone to talk to or sharing your experiences can relieve a huge amount of stress.
Make Time for Yourself (Even if It’s Just 10 Minutes)
It’s easy to lose yourself in the responsibilities of motherhood, but taking time for yourself is essential for stress relief. This doesn’t have to be a major commitment—start with just 10 minutes a day. Use this time to read a book, go for a quick walk, journal, meditate, or enjoy a hobby you love.
Carving out small moments for yourself reminds you that you’re not only a mom but also an individual with your own needs. Over time, these little acts of self-care can make a big difference in managing stress and maintaining your well-being.
Let Go of “Mom Guilt”
Mom guilt is a common feeling, but it only adds to your stress. Maybe you feel guilty for working, for not spending enough time with your kids, or for taking time for yourself. Whatever the reason, it’s important to remember that guilt doesn’t serve you or your family.
Remind yourself that you’re doing the best you can and that taking care of your own needs makes you a better, more present mom. Letting go of mom guilt may not happen overnight, but practicing self-compassion and reminding yourself that you’re enough can help.
Prioritize Sleep and Rest
Sleep is one of the first things to get sacrificed in motherhood, yet it’s essential for managing stress and maintaining a positive mindset. Try setting a regular bedtime for yourself, aiming to wind down at least 30 minutes before with a calming routine (like reading or deep breathing). If your little ones keep you up at night, consider incorporating rest times throughout the day, even if it’s just a few moments to close your eyes and relax.
Prioritizing rest gives you the energy you need to tackle the day’s demands and reduces feelings of overwhelm.
Celebrate Small Wins
Motherhood is filled with tiny victories, and taking time to recognize them can shift your mindset. Maybe you handled a tantrum with patience, got the kids to bed on time, or managed to squeeze in some exercise—celebrate these moments!
Recognizing your accomplishments, no matter how small, reminds you of your strengths and reinforces positive emotions, which can reduce stress.
Focus on the Joy in Everyday Moments
Motherhood can be stressful, but it’s also full of joy, love, and laughter. Take time to be present with your children, even if it’s just a few minutes. Put your phone down so you notice the small things—your child’s laugh, a hug, or a funny moment. When you focus on these moments, it can make the challenges feel a little lighter and remind you of the beauty of motherhood.
Finding Balance and Peace in Motherhood
Motherhood will always come with its share of challenges, but stress doesn’t have to overshadow the joy. By setting realistic expectations, creating a support system, practicing self-care, and letting go of perfection, you can build a more balanced, peaceful experience. Remember, taking care of yourself isn’t selfish—it’s essential for you and your family. When you prioritize your well-being, you’re better equipped to handle the ups and downs of motherhood with grace.
